Okay I m not even gonna try to be polite about this… I hate Halloween. There I said it.. judge me but it will not change my mind. My hatred for Halloween is one that grows with every passing year from the competitiveness of choosing a costume, by the way the point is to look scary not good going as a ‘businessman’ or ‘model’ is not a f**king costume morons, to the yearly pop culture fads that produce 100’s of identical costumes I am looking at you Stranger Things and Suicide Squad which seem to won the prize for most repeated costume this year.
If I see one more Will, wannabe Winona Ryder or Harley Quinn I may bludgeon either that person or myself.. basically one is us will need to go. I cannot deal with the predictable, cheesy antics of Halloween it drives me to an extra two glasses of wine a night which on top of my standard five glasses just isn’t healthy.
Aside from the adults, then you have them… the children. Never been a great lover of children I have always been a proponent of the whole people should be born like 15 and skip childhood but anywhos, Halloween just takes the things I dislike in a child i.e. lack of volume control, tantrums, candy buzz, sickening cuteness, general childhood wonder and amplifies them to painful levels which I am not ok with.
I am actually considering being that miserable neighbor that gives you fruit or mints when you call trick or treating just in the hope word spreads and it deters further visits. It’s either that or buy a big ass snake but I feel I would be slightly more apprehensive of the snake than the trick or treaters, note I say slightly that could change in the next 24 hours.
Tomorrow I will be stowed away in my apartment watching movies, eating food I will regret later and avoiding all Halloween related activities. Halloween… I got a deal for you… you don’t come to my door unwelcome and I will not come to yours?
Any other Halloweenaphobes out there? Any Halloween lovers you wanna put me in check? Apologies try to put me in check?
Sounding off and signing off.
The Sounder Xo